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“Are you sure Mr. Wayne needs these titanium bomb doors to his---uh, what’s this room for again?” one worker asked.
Our organic farm-to-table eatery is now also BYOM (Bring Your Own Meals). That’s right. You bring the food, we bring the vibes.
The first thing you will notice is that there are a lot of sober people at grocery stores. Can they tell you’re stoned?
It’s so easy! Even Adam Driver baked a humble pie when he came over my large home today.
Anyone know what jail Tommy is in? Maybe we could bring the reunion to him! Would be like the good ole days!
"I can’t even remember a time in my life when I did not love [dead rock star]." / "Shocked and saddened..."
I could tell he wasn’t like our past professors. There was a glimmer in his eye, a look that seemed to say: “I have had adventures with horses.”
That’s it. No need to risk making promises you can’t keep or guarantee sweeping policy reform that is realistically unattainable in the short term.
Quitticisim (kwit-??siz?m): The paralyzing decision to either delete or refresh Twitter every thirty seconds.
Let me wipe off the shaving cream and stow my kit bag where the emergency phone used to be.