Doesn’t fall correctly… I don’t know what the ideal shape would be, but this wasn’t it.
- DIY ax throwing in the parking lot - Fish microwaving contest - Egging Janet in HR’s car (for charity)
Someone or something begins to rattle the door back and forth as if trying to force it open. Suddenly, it stops.
You’re ashamed to be wearing something from Goodwill while everyone you know is wearing something gifted to them by their rich parents.
FALL Under The Spell Of The New York Blood Center’s Impending Autumn Drive. Ah-Ah-AH!
“Friends” Episode or Me Ordering a Shitty Microbrew I Can’t Remember the Name of by Describing the Stupid Label?
How you doin' (on this quiz)? Remember “The One with the Cake” and “The One with the Baby on the Bus”?
I have a bug in my mug. I have electric eels in my high heels. I have a giraffe in my carafe.
You're going to love taking phrases like "rodeos clown" and "bottlenoses dolphin" out for a spin!
Monday: Put on the same underwear you wore yesterday. Mistake a wolf for your grandma.
Moment of silence but for a page. Total accident and someone is definitely getting fired.
Providing an extra hand for “light as a feather stiff as a board” at your next sleepover / Watching your ex’s Instagram story and reporting on their whereabouts
My nephew crying because I “stole” one of “his” cheese curds that I bought / Scraping claws as a monster that has haunted me since birth moves closer