That’s where SquareSpace comes in. For just nine score and nine cents, you can receive six months’ subscription, plus a free domain name.
Whatever your personal weird fucking deal is, it won’t end well for you, so best not try to start it with us.
When a teacher assigns a five-paragraph essay, his or her whole class jumps for joy because this kind of essay is truly a thrill to both read and write.
I’ll scream your name as many times as you’d like, or, as a new feature, I’ll rip my shirt off to reveal another shirt with a picture of you screaming.
You spent 49 hours listening to our ear-piercing message alert sound…
It was fantastic! In the first week, I knocked over the office water cooler 36 times!
If you hear Wham!’s “Last Christmas” at Trader Joe’s, stop shopping immediately and guzzle a 32 oz. carton of eggnog. Post #Whamanogageddon!
Still seeking the level of inner peace of a woman in a commercial eating a single square of dark chocolate.
If you don’t finish the punchline of a dad joke, it becomes an absentee father joke.
My wife thinks I’m suffering from depression, but I’m just experiencing a reduction in gross domestic product over two consecutive quarters.
Before the tension in the air makes someone scream, say quietly, "I could tell you, but then—well, you know…"
You see a small cottage at the edge of the field-- “A cottage? What is this? A visualization or something?”
High school locker combination [-1.2 MB] I deleted my entire high school experience in 2016. Missed this somehow. Move to trash.
My boss said guests don’t want to see “gray smudges” while enjoying their complimentary light breakfast. I said they would once they read the essay I left by the bagel station.
I never snuck out because unfortunately, my parents understood that late-night parties were an integral part of a teenager’s socialization.
- Hebrewka falls so early this year. - Harmonica, the Festival of Lights.
After learning that Big Bird’s top four films on Letterboxd were American, Jeremy forced Big Bird to undergo something called “Bergman Boot Camp.”
