Are you embarrassed that I called you out, and now suffer from some sort of movie monster performance anxiety?
Am I okay? The short answer: no. The long answer: noooooooo.
My neighbors wanted their children to grow up bilingual so they alternated days in which they spoke English and French. This was not a problem until their son came to work with me and I couldn’t understand him half the time.
When I walk my dog, I get the sense he thinks he’s doing me a favor.
We're lucky to have such great brands to remind us that individuals could be doing more to save the planet from the brink of ecological collapse.
And as we count down from five, we allow ourselves to become even more amused… Four, letting all of the non-amusement just gently melt away…
It’s ironic that Freddy Krueger’s initials are FK because the guy should be Fucking Kancelled.
The big bag is a safer purchase. Now it won’t be the end of the world if I have one. I’d hate to disappoint the kids two years in a row.
It’s a zero-sum game out there. Every piece of candy you don’t get goes into the gaping, cavity-filled maw of some other kid.
Admire the local artisanship on display, particularly the humanoid stick figures bound in twine looming overhead in the trees.
The monster in the poem “dwelt in the moor-fens, the marsh and the fastness”--and guess what, that’s exactly where my monster dwelt.
Be tidy. If you have showered in body fluids, towel off before excursions.
The dads effectively hit everything except the ball causing a lot of property damage while the factory workers could not settle on a bat.
MINDLESS EATING MACHINES, TO STRIKE TERROR INTO THE HEARTS OF MEN. FOR MAN IS THE WARMEST PLACE TO HIDE. For $2 more the pizzas come with extra cheese.
