Weekly funny lists for readers on the go. Quizzes
Ask whether they want to eat off of a flat plate or an upside-down bowl. Your child will soon realize that flat surfaces are the only way to go!
You find throwing stars in the scratching post. / Your search history reads: "kibble download free" "cat fail compilation" "overthrow fleshy tyrant king"
1327 AD: “I love this new “Ring Around the Rosie” Song!” vs. “I hate that schools are trying to make this bubonic plague sound fun!”
Help: Never be afraid to ask for help. Some couples go to a marital counselor for help. Help.
3. Time heals all wounds. a. True b. False c. Depends on the wound. d. Depends on the day.
Attorney Up Close: The lightly sweaty smell of a middle-aged man’s neck you’re pressed against during rush hour on the train home from work.
Andrew Cuomo: Intimidate, Inoculate, Incriminate Ted Bundy: Marry, Fuck, Kill Hamlet: Be, Not Be, Wonder Lil Nas X: Yee, Haw, Satan-Worship
All Time Low: Dear Maria, Count Me Out, I Have a Baby Shower That Day Green Day: Crate and Barrel Case
Known for ruining weddings Feels very repetitive, and makes it seem like you’re dying Love it or hate it, left a permanent stamp on the cultu…
The Human Flashlight She’ll find those evil villains hiding in the dark, oh yes, she will. (Unless she’s recharging at home, of course.)
- Saying “have fun” when someone says they have to go to the bathroom - Seductively unbuckling one of the buckles on your left shoe
Before your friend has the chance to say, “How’ve you been?” grab all three of you into a hug and take selfies.