Kaffe-üh oh – The action of checking your bank account balance while you stand in line at a coffee shop.

Ängstlich – The sudden realization that it’s the end of the month, again, and rent is due, again.

Das Regrüt – A feeling of deep regret towards a recent purchase, usually accompanied by a spiraling sense of financial irresponsibility.

Example: Das Regrüt! sieben Dollar für einen Kaffee! = I wish I hadn’t spent seven dollars on a coffee! If I never splurged on coffee at all, I probably wouldn’t be so worried about rent right now. Alternatively, I wouldn’t be so worried about rent right now if I had a better career. Perhaps my mother was right when she said I couldn’t make it as a freelance writer. But then again, I work hard. So hard. Maybe the problem isn’t me at all. Maybe it’s capitalism. Maybe–

Höp efül – The mixture of feelings that emerge when, suddenly, you remember a friend owes you $75. First, excitement. Then, dread: you have to find a way to breach the topic tactfully.

Betre yäd – The deep well of sadness that follows being ghosted by a friend.

Skum ö Mann – Hard to translate, Skum ö Mann is best described as “the disgust you feel towards your landlord, Chris, who just texted you ‘reminder that rent is due tomorrow’ with a smiley emoji, and still hasn’t fixed the heating unit he promised to look at three months ago.”

Mutter-Säd – The action of calling your mother for the first time in over a month to ask for money, but chickening out because she’s so excited to talk to you and you don’t want to disappoint her.

Fetsfermönee – The act of drafting a tweet about selling pictures of your feet, then deleting it because your mother follows you.

Giggecönömy – Suddenly receiving a check from a company that took so long to pay you for freelance work that you forgot they owed you money at all; a mix of relief and anger.

Aaaaaaaaaaänein – Sending an e-transfer to your landlord, Scummy Chris, and immediately remembering that, a month from now, you’ll have to do it again.


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