We’re sure you’re a nice enough guy. It’s just that 0 for 15 on job applications seems like it could be time to try a new approach. Shake things up a little with LinkedIn Premium! We're sure you'll find something out there that fits you. Like, pretty sure—Free for the first 7 days! 👔 (But maybe plan on more than 7👍)


Do you know who else feels like they experience imposter syndrome? Imposters🙈 Press mute on unsettling thoughts like this by turning up the volume on a new pair of Beats by Dr. Dre 🔈 🔉 🔊


Not every first-date will be THE first-date. And I’m sure you’re not the only one who's watched a girl say she had to go to the restroom, take her coat, and walk straight out of the front door making no effort to conceal her exit. What you shouldn’t do is go home and beat yourself up about it on a 12-year old mattress. Give it a day and wake up feeling fresh enough to overanalyze every word exchanged the night before with Tempur-Pedic®! 😴🤪


It probably wasn’t a personality thing. Could have just been your general anxiety-induced body smell? Having above-average-sized sweat glands calls for above-average sized solutions like these massive buy one get one deals on name-brand soap from Walmart! One of them has to work🧼✅


Your therapist was right. Childhood trauma is not first date conversation material. But you know what might be? Suntans in Southern California. Take advantage of low airfare and give yourself a break from self-loathing. 🛬🏖️🛫


It's already been 13 years since you lied to your 7th-grade class about having high-profile, “Billy Gates” rich parents. Don’t let another second-hand hoodie from The GAP be an obvious sign that you come from a middle-class amount of money and questionable tastes ever again. Check out these hot deals on designer hoodies, t’s, and more from H&M! 🔥🥵🔥


Remember Stevie? The kid who still tried to be nice to you after you kept telling everybody the CEO of Mountain Dew was your dad and that he was creating a flavor of Mountain Dew named after you, “Mountain Dew: Code Richard”? Then you tried to turn everyone on him by making fun of his slight stutter? Stevie and hundreds of other hiring managers are looking for qualified candidates just like you on Indeed! Where more people find jobs than anywhere else. 💸💸 💸


If you’d just told people your mom left your dad, they’d have understood. Instead of telling them she was in a band and had to go on a world-wide tour with Green Day for the release of “Dookie.” And that she never called because Green Day wanted to make sure everyone stayed focused and rehearsals were pretty intense but Billie Joe Armstrong saw a lot of potential in her so it was worth it. Stream hit songs off Dookie and more hits from Green Day with Spotify premium today! 🎶💚


When you live in a small town, there are only so many places to hide after you’ve spun such an encompassing web of lies. Find great deals on apartments from 2, 12, or 200 towns over on apartments.com—where the cheapest rates in every town live. 🏠 😉


LinkedIn Premium Push Notification: An entry-level brand manager position with Mountain Dew has opened up! Maybe you could work your way up, and who knows? Could be a great story! 📖

Related

Resources