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"A lesser airport CEO would have focused on vanity projects, like adding more of those carts that escort people faking injuries or improving security, but not Mario."
Ok, so it looks like they’re depicting the many scourges man has brought upon this Earth.
Students will become acquainted with works of literary importance—or as we refer to them, “leverageable assets with income producing potential.”
Instead of the dangerous, unethical practice of cloning once-extinct dinosaurs, our exhibits are human clones who pretend to be dinosaurs.
I am here to keep the small talk alive because everyone else is so locked in that they forget how to socialize.
“One final touch, my dear boy,” his Grandma said, carefully placing an entire stick of butter on top of the dish.
Applewhite brought a sense of wisdom and dignity to the role of Grandpa Tugboat, the wise old ship that dispenses much-needed advice.
Your deal is Polaroids, right? That’s cute. I don’t mean that in a condescending way.
Have you tried burping? What about being burped? It’s okay to be small and fragile sometimes. Or all the time.
Did they really hurt their ankle or do they just want to stop hiking with you because you brought your own poop bag?
The study ended after the cone of peach ripple divorced its husband on the grounds that he was having an affair with a strawberry cheesecake.
Behind every great man may be a great woman. But behind every great woman is an epic bunk bed.