A New Ache

Jonah awoke one morning to find his feet had been possessed. When he stood, a demon shot pain through his heels and (only occasionally) up his legs. But the doctor’s prognosis was far more terrifying: plantar fasciitis.

The First-Time Home Buyers

The pretty yellow house was near the woods. No one had lived in it for decades, and some whispered it was haunted. Then a nice couple from out of state purchased it. Soon, they arrived and unloaded their moving pods. That night, they went to bed as a storm moved in. Lightning boomed, rain pounded, and then… CRASH.

They rushed into the living room to find the ceiling caved in. Their home inspection had missed a major structural problem.

The Spotlight

Sarah went to the trendy new Italian restaurant in her neighborhood. She’d heard whispers of a delicious menu and a moody, romantic atmosphere. But as she squinted to read her menu’s tiny print, a light shined perfectly over her shoulder. She turned around but found no lamp or helpful maitre d’. She returned to her menu, which for some ungodly reason was printed in eight-point font. And there it was again: the strange beam of illumination.

Frightened, she whipped around and found a creepy spectre in the chair next to her: her husband, smiling sweetly, holding a penlight. Horror-struck, she faced a new realization: she needed readers.

Curse of the Black Cat

Annie was home alone when she heard a loud bang in her bathroom. Terrified, she opened the door to a chilling sight—her cat knocked her toiletries off the sink. Worse, her toothbrush landed on a hairball stuck to a toilet scrubber that dated back to the first Obama Administration.

The First-Time Home Buyers, Part Two

The nice couple from out of state wasn’t deterred from their home’s structural issues.

“It’s an old house,” they told themselves. “We’re lucky it wasn’t worse,” they said.

Then one chilly night they opened their bedroom door to find an industrial-era ghost pointing to the corner. She turned to them and spoke in a rasp, “I found mouse droppings. Plural.”

The Tell-Tale Corporate Landscaping

Jenn was starting a new job as a social media manager. Someone else had been in the role recently, then mysteriously disappeared. As Jenn unpacked her Leslie Knope Funko Pop, she heard a rap-tap-tapping at her office window.

“It’s just a tree very pointedly trying to scare me. It’s nothing,” she thought. But the scraping grew louder, screechier, and even more pointed. Suddenly, she heard a shriek and ran to the window. On the other side of the glass staring back at her was her wild-eyed predecessor waving a dead branch.

“Run!” yelled the former employee. “The execs text you on weekends then take credit for your ideas. They only promote people who work 18-hour days. The CEO stans Elon Musk! Still!”

Spooked, Jenn re-packed. Many people have since tried to occupy the same office, but all left in the first week. To this day, the job listing remains active on LinkedIn.

Plinkety Plink

Elizabeth had just settled onto the couch, eager to read the Sunday New York Times. But just as she began the latest article about Ben Affleck getting his groove back, she heard an odd sound coming from upstairs. “Plinkety plink,” it went. She heard it again. “Plinkety plink, plinkety plink.”

At first Elizabeth ignored it. She focused back on her paper, but the sound became more insistent. “Plinkety plink, plinkety plink!” Finally, she climbed the stairs with dread. And there she found her phone with a message from CVS: “Your new insurance will not approve your medication without a notice from your doctor. Please fax all documentation.”

Elizabeth disappeared that night.

But at the start of every new fiscal year, her spirit can be seen pacing the city center asking passersby where she can find a functioning fax machine.

The First-Time Home Buyers, Part Three

The nice couple from out of state quickly learned their ghost didn’t want to hurt them, at least not physically. Instead, she mostly just floated around pointing out dusty base boards.

The Invite

It was a Friday afternoon when Miranda got a meeting request for 4:00 PM that day. She let out a banshee scream and was never seen again.