Here at HGTV we’re excited to announce our exclusive rights to the all-new Joyce Byers Complete Home Makeover Show, the first-ever home improvement television series in which a variety of houses are transformed into amazingly uninhabitable portals to an alternate dimension. Hosted by our one-of-a-kind professional home remodeling expert, Joyce Byers, this sure-to-be hit show will delight viewers as they tune in each week to witness participants’ dreams of a brighter, more modern living space go totally unfulfilled as they are instead forced to contend with Joyce’s passionate efforts to dismantle their house from the inside out as part of her relentless quest to find her sometimes missing son, Will.
Yes, that’s right we said sometimes, because every episode is different and filled with fun, unique surprises for the participants whose homes have been selected to be revamped with rampant signs of intense physical and psychological trauma. So while Will may not necessarily be lurking in the bones of a house, a demogorgon very well might be! And whenever a demogorgon is present, that can only mean one thing in terms of home remodeling: extreme partial wall removal! Which is also an effective strategy for letting in more natural light, and one that Joyce has personally mastered better than any other host of any other home or lifestyle show out there.
Our whole mantra for the Joyce Byers Complete Home Makeover Show is that it’s all about going big and going home. It’s not some sort of either/or, and the show’s unwitting participants always learn this the hard way at the very outset of their dedicated episode when Joyce shows up at their property with her signature box full of 35-year-old corded phones. While our participants never fully understand why she thinks these outdated phones may help her find her son in their home, they usually stop caring about her rationale after she makes various failed attempts to connect with him across dimensions and instead induces numerous power outages and accidentally summons yet another demogorgon.
Additionally, we’re sure that viewers will love the iconic aesthetic that Joyce brings to every home improvement project that she undertakes. Her personal touch is present in every detail of every job—from her step-by-step strategies on how to most effectively position multiple space heaters in a single room for exorcism purposes to her unremittent use of Christmas lights in every room during every season for otherworldly communication purposes. In fact, a large part of Joyce’s wild success at interior decoration may be credited to her keen eye and the nuances of her approach. This is especially evidenced by her frequent insistence on covering every visible vertical and horizontal surface (literally) with a wall paper pattern scrawled by a distraught child possessed by an inhuman entity known simply as the mind flayer.
Lastly, we’re especially excited about the select special episodes that will feature our guest star, Joyce’s other son, Jonathan. These episodes will be a real treat for viewers because whenever Jonathan arrives on the scene unannounced, he always shows up carrying a homemade spiked club, questions his mother’s sanity, and then adheres a poster of The Clash to an utterly ruined wall. He then wonders aloud whether he should stay or whether he should go and the on-screen awkwardness that ensues between the two home remodeling professionals while the show’s devastated participants passively watch it all unfold is the stuff of magic that no top-rated home improvement show can afford to do without.
Airing on Sunday nights immediately after Beachfront Bargain Hunt, the premiere season of the Joyce Byers Complete Home Makeover Show is perfectly poised to be the breakthrough series that finally substantially expands HGTV’s reach into audiences born or raised in the 1980s.