I’m the $1500 Macbook You Bought for Writing and I’m Definitely Not Judging You for Just Using Me to Watch Videos of Airplanes Landing
I mean, that’s fine isn’t it? I cost $1500, I’m considered to be the best laptop on the market right now.
Tag: Tech
“Democracy Will Perish Unless You Follow Me on Social Media”—A Note from Your Congressman
Did you see my tweet from this morning saying I take everyone’s concerns seriously, accompanied by a gif from The Office?
Notifications from Your Sleep-Deprived Mac
Your Mac is overheating. Your Mac can’t stop looking up the symptoms of rare computer viruses.
Adobe Hypnotizes You with their Updated Terms of Service for A.I.
You're getting very sleepy... when you wake up, A.I. will make your life worth living.
I Have Once Again Left a YouTube Comment Quoting the Third-Funniest Line from the Video
Art is supposed to challenge us, to make us think, to make us laugh, to make us uncomfortable, and to make us say, “I remember that line from the video I just watched.”
Save Money on Your Next Ride with Uber’s Bargain Bin!
Shaniqua is a life coach. When she asks, “What’s your destination?” she doesn’t mean on this trip; she’s talking about your life’s journey.
An Open Letter to the Man Who’s Liked Me on Hinge Five Times
My profile specifically states I'm looking for "the Jim to my Pam," meanwhile you're still "figuring out your relationship type."
When “Your Password Is Insecure” vs. When “Your Password Is Confident”
Your Password Is Insecure: password Your Password Is Confident: Password.Period.
I Am Proof That Neuralink Works!
Soon we'll live in a world where Neuralink will let us surf the internet just by thinking about it and bleeding from our eyes.
It’s AT&T, We Apologize for Thursday’s Outage and Also Why Won’t You Talk to Me?!
11:45 PM: Really starting to get worried. 12:12 AM: Are you mad at us? 1:37 AM: Did you block us?
If LinkedIn Existed During Biblical Times
HIRING: One male and one female of every animal. Please submit a cover letter explaining why you are the most qualified/fertile of your species.
I’m an Elite Professional Quarterback, but My Coaches Don’t Trust Me with the Team’s Tablet
When I switched to the New York Times mini-crossword they yelled at me again---and put child locks on so I could only look at replays.