1. Preys on the old men outside Walgreens

2. Frolics across Floridian beaches

3. Slept with Chris Cuomo

4. Fueled by ejaculated droplets

5. Insists that you lick the brownie-battered spoon

6. Fantasizes about a bound and gagged Dr. Anthony Fauci

7. Has a weird thing for Italian men

8. Hates it when you use protection

9. Encourages drool play

10. Makes you feel super hot

11. Prefers cramped dungeons with no ventilation

12. Wants you to suck your thumb

13. Doesn’t mind which orifice it enters

14. Leaves others with the need to get tested

15. Loves a bad boy who smokes

16. Pleased by excessive fluid leakage

17. Banned by Carnival Cruises but sneaks on anyway

18. Filthy, yet still above entering Mike Pence

19. Makes you spasm

20. Killed my grandpa


COVID-19: 3, 4, 13
My Grandma: 5, 7, 18, 20
Both: 1, 2, 6, 8-12, 14-17, 19


And now a quick joke...

ALWAYS recycle dead batteries. NEVER put them in the garbage. My brother WILL go through your trash and he WILL throw them at me if he finds them!!