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Don't be intimidated, I'm still just like you, only quite a bit better now. You see, I read an entire book during quarantine.
Listen, you're already on thin ice with me. You and I both know this ain't the first time we've found ourselves here.
Pick teams with orange as one of their colors. Orange doesn’t rhyme with anything, and neither does victory.
My motivation was killed by me throwing my phone out the window when my alarm went off for the fifth time and I didn’t want to get up for a run.
I am a large gorilla. And gorillas are soft, exoskeleton-less, atomic-breath-lacking, nonaquatic, vegetarian mammals.
Let me know how I can be of use. Today’s Tip: You’re spending too much time on Twitter at the expense of your personal relationships!
I am a human from Earth, but please don't hold that against me. I believe that this is an asset, as I have witnessed what not to do with a planet
BrickUp developed bricks large enough to destroy data centers, but small enough to conceal from evil clones of Regis Philbin.
The queen travels around the board very fast, knocking over the other pieces, sometimes singing "Let It Go" from Disney’s Frozen.
Can you see this? Yes, of course. What is it? A banana. No, I mean, like, what color is it? Yellow.
You’ve sworn you’ve heard the unmistakable “thunk” of a peg-leg issuing from their mic on more than one Zoom call.
I scroll through my Venmo feed with fervor, finding out more about your lives from a cash app than I do from the photos you share on Instagram.