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    Marcus Terry's picture

    Legends of the Hidden Temple Ruined My Life

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    Olmec and Kirk Fogg from Legends of the Hidden Temple

    The year was 1994. I was 12 years old. It was a summer I'd never forget and an event from which I would never recover. I got the call in August. After auditioning a couple months before, I'd almost forgotten about the show. But they called and said I'd made it. I'd be taping my episode in September. Read More »

    Atlas Jobinson's picture

    Two Chinks in Batman's Armor

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    Batman and Robin kissing

    Allow me to start by saying that Batman is the best superhero out there.  This is obvious to anyone with a brain.  He has no superhuman abilities, yet he still kicks ass.

    That said, I have made two recent discoveries which have slightly, and only slightly, lessened Batman's reputation in my mind.  The first such revelation occurred when I saw this comic strip: Read More »

    Alex Boonstra's picture

    A Step-by-Step Guide to Naming Your Penis and Testicles

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    Penis and Testicles

    Ahh yeah, The Brothers. The Twins. Your Sack O' Surprises. Whatever your pet name for your scrotum is, it is very important to you. After all, you've had your ball sack for nearly your entire life, and you know it better than any other person. Maybe it has a distinctive feature that deems it unique, like a mole or a freckle. Read More »

    Jeremy Blutstein's picture

    Eastern Medicine on a Western Man

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    Acupuncture needles sticking in a male mannequin

    Aside from writing, the only other thing I might be good at is being stressed out. I can be stressed about anything. If it's remotely unsettling, I can be stressed out about it. It could be something big like the CIA falsely accusing me, or something small like the way a girl on the street looked at me. You name it and I can be stressed out about it. Read More »

    Evan Lehrer's picture

    Stop Having Sex with Your High School Girlfriend

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    Two high school girls whispering at a locker

    Yeah, I'm talking to you. You tool. You sycophant. You whelp. You coward. Go on and cry, I'll wait.... What am I talking about? That you—a guy in college—are going out with a high school chick. What. The. Fuck. Read More »

    Aaron Castellan's picture

    God's First Try

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    Shitbox the Dodo Bird

    A long, long time ago God was all alone in the world. He lived alone, ate alone and drank alone. He had no friends, no followers, no believers—just himself and all the power in the universe. Read More »


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