“I don't say he's a great man. Willy Loman never got a lot of retweets. His name was never trending. He's not the wokest character that ever lived. But he's a human, and a terrible thing is happening to him. So his content should be shared.”

“The only thing you've got in this world is what you can make viral.”

“They don't need me on Twitter. I'm the Instagram Man. I'm vital on Instagram.”

“The man who posts quirky content with regularity is the man who gets ahead. Be calculated and unique and you will never be thirsty.”

“I simply asked him if he was getting any likes. Is that a criticism?”

“Cause what could be more satisfying than to be able to go on Facebook Live and be remembered and loved by like four different people you don't really know?”

“Why, boys, when I was in college, I cooped up in my dorm-room developing a social network that objectified women, and when I was twenty, I dropped out. And by god I was rich.”

“Pop, I have no platform! I have no platform, Pop! Can't you understand? There's no spite in it anymore. I'm cancelled. That's all.”

“Well, I spent six or seven years after high school trying to boost my profile. Vlogging and blogging of one kind or another. And it's a measly manner of existence. To get on the gram with a low battery and limited data. To devote your whole life to hashtags, and DIY videos, or keeping up with threads and making sure you don't get ratioed. To suffer with twenty-three tabs open for the sake of another eight followers, when all you really desire is to be meditating in a room with essential oils. And always to have to get ahead of the next fella. And still - that's how you build a following.”

“See Biff, everyone around me is so false that I'm constantly cheapening my brand.”

“He's liked, but he has no stans.”

“You can't eat the avocado and throw away the pit - a man is not a piece of fruit.”

“Sometimes it's better for a man just to take a social media detox. But if you can't give up your streaks? I guess that's when it's tough.”

[Music is heard as behind a scrim, dimly seen, THE VSCO WOMAN is dressing.]

“I stopped in the middle of that WeWork office and I saw - my soul. I saw the things that I love in this world - and time, time for mindfulness and internal work, time to shift my energy and sit and vape. And I clutched my Juul pen and said to myself, what the hell am I doing this for? Why am I trying to become what I don't want to be? What am I doing in a co-working space, making a contemptuous begging fool of myself, when my best life is out there, waiting for me the minute I say: ‘This is who I am, and this is my truth.'”

“Before it's all over, we're gonna get a little cabin down in Colombia, and I'll lead a yoga retreat and get high on ayahuasca for days.”

“His life ended after that E-Sports tournament. From the age of seventeen, nothing good ever happened to him.”

“There's more of Willy in that mocha nitro cold brew than in all the posts he ever made.”

“After all the selfies and the duckfaces and the filters and the boomerangs, you end up worth more as a GIF than alive.”

“I've got to get some succulents. I've got to get some succulents, right away. Nothing's planted. I don't have a single succulent. I don't have a thing.”

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