Please do not straddle the beast unless you have experience wielding crotch rockets of NASA caliber.
Although, if I’m honest, Amanda has horrible email etiquette. One time she shared her screen during a meeting and I saw 12,000 unread emails.
Your message may simply be too sophisticated to be understood by lower life forms.
70 ft: Screw it, I’m just going to wave. Social norms be damned! 65 ft: Shit, he’s definitely not looking at me.
- DIY ax throwing in the parking lot - Fish microwaving contest - Egging Janet in HR’s car (for charity)
Easy Answers to Common Job Interview Questions for Anyone Who Was Saved by a Swamp Creature When They Were Nine
In five years I hope I can stop dwelling on the time when I was sucked into the thick swamp ooze only to be rescued by a creature of the night.
Trent Dribbly is a gale-force wind of fresh air with his unapologetic attitude about stealing leftover food from coworkers.
Work Anniversaries: See your manager for a token of our appreciation—a homemade coupon for one (1) weak handshake.
Like our CEO wrote in his “Daily Wake-Up” email, all of our cubicles can be temples of productivity.
Would you rather spend 25% of your paycheck on Everlane’s "Sims 2 Fall/Winter ‘23 collection” or trompe l'oeil mascara onto your face with a free Zoom filter?
Millennials and Gen Z don’t understand how valuable a sense of camaraderie is, or how important mistress time is.
Time off task (12 minutes): Nerve sensors detected hunger prior to your lunch break. Hunger is personal time.