The U15-Humanoid Robot was granted independence by the Government or Earth, and the first thing it decided to do was find a human to marry.
We will have an authentic Old Crone sitting in the back of your wedding venue, looking out of place and muttering curses under her breath.
I don’t even have the mental energy to try to win her back because your little stunt has put me in such an awful financial situation.
Seeing you both now, I think we will sue. Sorry—I think we will. SUE, and Noah, you are clearly blessed.
The first thing I noticed was my temporary roommates smiled and clapped each time they saw the Grinch’s glorious glutes.
Subscription to the Nonrefundable Security Deposit Wine of the Month Club – Let them drown their sorrows with Funk Band Bordeaux or Bouquet of Rosé.
The Maid of Honor Speech I Gave as the Heartbeat of the Old Man with the Evil Eye Grew Louder and Louder from the Floorboards Below
It sounds like it’s coming from… Oh, Dave says it’s his heart beating quick, stealing glances at his beautiful new bride.
I only had a raging meltdown at the one other wedding ceremony I’ve attended, and that bitch I was marrying totally asked for it (I love my wife).
If Keith's dad had to pick between his son having pre-marital sex or spreading a dangerous virus to 80 loved ones, how quickly did he choose wedding?
Woody and Rayleen Blight / Joyfully announce the recent trade of their / Rusted, two-door Ford F150 for / A 2020 black, full-sized Dodge Ram pickup
Earlier this afternoon I saw an unidentified man meet his life’s untimely finish line right on the same athletic track where we competed as teens.
Knitting With Dog Hair: The three sets of socks will keep Jonathan's feet warm when he is cold and his mouth shut when he is snoring.