Help! My Emotional Support Python is Killing Me!
Maybe, if you roll up your in-flight magazine and hit him really hard on the nose with your free hand--- Oh, Saint Jude! He’s unhinged his jaw now…
Tag: Airplanes
This Isn’t an Oversized Carry On, It’s My Emotional Support Luggage
We’ve only known each other for a short period, which can be quantified as “just shy of Costco’s return policy,” but we’ve formed a intimate bond.
New Economy Seating Options at United Airlines
Our Economy Basic passengers are seated in a section of the plane teeming with luxury-hungry wolves, starving for cherished Basic ticket-holders.
What to Make of America’s 2018 Olympic Men’s Curling Gold?
Facing 20 to 1 underdog odds, the American Men's Curling team somehow took down powerhouses like Canada and Roomba for the gold medal.
The Adventure of Mom and Toddler to the Airport Gate
My two-year-old then "dove" towards the airport floor, arms straight behind her as Moana's are when she swims down for the heart of Te Fiti.
How to Helicopter Parent for the 1% Under the New Tax Bill
Strap your child in tight: no one wants to be jostled in the helicopter mid-air, even if it's a short ride from the Upper East Side to the Hamptons.
The 7 Sexiest Airport Departure Lounges in Florida
For all you thrill-seekers planning your next naughty weekend in the Sunshine State, here's our definitive visitor's guide to the sexiest airport departure lounges in Florida.
Flying High in the Xanax Skies
Where was I? How high is high? Why was I sitting there? Had I been sleeping the whole time? Is all of life a dream, as Descartes once suggested?
10 New Common Sense Rules to Make Air Travel More Pleasant
If you still don't know that going through airport security means only packing liquids portioned for an American Girl doll, you don't deserve to go to the Bahamas.
Now Boarding Flight 1786 to New York’s LaGuardia Airport
Going by the presence of all black clothing, oversized headphones, lattes, and jaded demeanors, it appears you're all definitely in the correct gate area.
The 4 Most Likely Theories Explaining the Missing Malaysia Flight 370
Could this be a hijacking of both a plane and the American public to try to teach them something about geography? Somebody get Nance Grace on this.
Quiz: What Kind of Malaysia Airlines Disappearance Theorist Are You?
A 10-question quiz to reveal your Malaysia Airlines Flight 370 Disappearance Theorist identity Are you the Pilot Suicide, the Catastrophic Failure, or something else?