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Climbing out of my grave, I savor the autumn air before dusting off my outfit: an oversized cardigan, plaid scarf, Uggs, and Lululemon leggings.
Some of my other ubiquitous work is "Call Your Mom" and "Single-Line, Semi-Erect Penis and Balls, With Hair Sprigs."
I come from a long line of well-known, obnoxious sounds. My father was the blast from a cruise ship, my uncle was the exhaust rattle of a Harley.
I haven’t thought about you, but I’m sure you’ve thought of me plenty between the scars I left on your psyche and my popular, unprofessional TikToks.
“Is there a doctor on the plane? Specifically, someone with a PhD in Mathematics with a focus on algebraic geometry?”
Boxer is our farm goat and he loves meeting people. Don’t be alarmed if he tries to bite the screen since he doesn’t fully grasp what a laptop is.
JOE: Talene, it’s Joe. TALENE: I know :)) TALENE: it’s so good to hear from you TALENE: I feel like we kind of fell off a few nights ago....
I wish you could see how stupid you look right now. Eyeing me like a curious toddler. Sniffing me like a confused caveman.
Minty Mask: A light treat with undernotes of chemically treated paper, this is sure to be a crowd pleaser (socially distanced, natch).
You will be scrubbed down and sterilized before entering the house. It will be painful, but it is the only way to ensure a clean pre-teen.
You have a toddler; we have a dwindling supply of troops for a little ongoing altercation with neighboring trolls. Let’s help each other!
It’s true that after I woke up from my forty-five-year coma last week, I was tempted to change gears. But I couldn’t temper my passion.