Put simply, the new normal is the normal that is currently substituting what is actually normal by normal standards.
Does this apartment have a laundry machine, and just out of curiosity, has anyone discovered a way to wash the mind?
The phone is for calling the bullpen, not pranking the loser ump by telling him his wife is in labor.
He also borrowed my weed whacker. How do you get it back from an oligarch? Weed whacking is activity of peasant, not fitting of powerful oligarch .
Q: I have no symptoms, but yesterday I had a sexy dream about my flatmate and now I feel... awkward? A: Fly! Fly! Thy death wound is upon thee!
"For real, what will it cost?" Well, it's not a cost per se, but there is will be a very small upfront investment… just to start.
Should I comment on my employees' ethnicity? We recommend a "don't ask don't tell" policy. Everyone should be white in your eyes.
Can you show me examples of crimes against humanity the organization has been working on? Would I be able to represent ISIS at industry conferences?
Who's Approving All These People to Drive Electric Mopeds in New York in Less Than 15 Minutes? Steve!
Oh my god, I literally have nothing to put on my college applications. Why did you let me quit cross country?
When I give blood, does the needle the doctors use make a hole in my arm that a ghost could get into?
Q; What happened to Leonard? A: Leonard was catapulted through a vibrating and glowing door frame into a space between dimensions.