’m going to run, jump, and climb over anything that stands between me and other people thinking good thoughts about me.
Rodney is a baby and I am an adult man. We look nothing alike. For starters, look at how much smaller Rodney is than me.
Are you picturing the powder keg? Think back to the last time you went out to sea and needed to bring a large amount of gunpowder.
By the time your child is in elementary school, they’ll be able to replace your basement door with a beaded curtain adorned with Grateful Dead skulls.
Trent Dribbly is a gale-force wind of fresh air with his unapologetic attitude about stealing leftover food from coworkers.
Somewhere, up in the cloud someplace, there is a benevolent being that can let you back into your SubzScription account.
I keep trying to bring up how none of us know our new lines or fit into our new costumes, but Duncan just keeps shouting, “That’s showbiz, baby.”
Writers: Are You a Plotter, a Pantser, or Are You Plotting Revenge on the Kid Who Pantsed You in High School Gym Class?
Some write to live out a fantasy that they were never granted: revenge on Frankie Wick, who pantsed them in Ms. Dakota’s class in the 9th grade.
Come on, these kids only have so much grit before they get completely fatigued.
"A true friend doesn’t complain that they can’t give you their hoodie because their undershirt has an old stain.” --Anonymous
I assure you that there is no better place to be than in a rickety metal porch swing slowly ascending to the sky!
Recite a mantra of personal affirmation loudly so that if someone were in the linen closet, they could hear you, but they’re not, so don’t worry.