Fuck, what's that one movie, it's like on the tip of my tongue but I can't remember the fucking name, shit, fuck, it's like, fuck, there's that one girl in it who made a cameo in 7th Heaven back in like, season three I think, she plays a really small part of like an ice cream truck driver I think, and one of the dudes from one of the McDonald's commercials from 2003 is in it playing a drug-dealing chimp who falls in love with a skateboard girl, in the show that's playing on the TV during the love scene of the movie that I can't remember the name of, and Chad Johnson from the Bengals plays Bigfoot and everyone's like “oh my God, Bigfoot is real” but the make-up and costume crew didn't even make him look like Bigfoot, actually they just put a #85 jersey on him and he just looks like himself, but everyone's taking video and pictures of him and being like “SASQUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATCCCCCCHHHHH!” and the guy from those Beef Jerky commercials who plays Sasquatch plays Chad Johnson but he stays in his Sasquatch outfit and he doesn't look like Chad Johnson at all and he's not even black, and the Cleveland Browns cheerleading squad is in the movie but they're all really ugly, and the guy who hosted the original Price is Right before Bob Barker is in the movie, but he plays a dead guy (because he's dead in real life), and the plot of the movie is that a porn director tries to create an Oscar-winning porno while dealing with several personal issues including his son beating a baby to death for giving him the wrong look, his brother borrowing tons of money from him to create the first porta-potty elevator and during the drafting process he shits all over the house, maybe because the intense amounts of meth he's prescribed to has fried his brain but maybe not; anyways, the dude consults the wise Morgan Freeman but Morgan's all like “can't help you, bro” and in the middle of the movie the porn director, who's also the mayor of his house, is caught snorting birth control pills, so his wife starts cheating on him with his mistress just to say “hey, I know you were cheating on me and guess what I'm a lesbian now,” and so the porn director in the midst of all these personal turmoils, becomes a Buddhist monk but is thrown out for breaking the monk code of silence, what happened was another monk dropped a bag of bricks on the porn-director-turned-monk's foot and he yelled out “FUCK!” and he was thrown out of there, and so he must go back to the U.S. but he realizes he gave up all his earthly possessions like money so he can't afford a plane ticket back, so he fucks his way across the country, having sex with the girl who played Roseanne on Roseanne and then he gets thrown in jail for having sex with the dictator's daughter but she's in love with him so she breaks him out of the prison and they're in love and she gets him out of the country and she's about to leave him at the border and say goodbye to him forever and he begs her to come with him and she does and they hitchhike over the ocean back to America and marry and he realizes that his life will be the basis for his Oscar dream porno, and so he writes up a script about his experiences over the past year, he directs, films, and stars in the porno with his new wife and they live and fuck happily ever after; and the credits are Dog the Bounty Hunter and Michael “Kramer” Richards standing next to each other staring at the camera repeating the N-word over and over while the credits roll, fuck, what's the name of that movie?!?