Humor writing published daily. Featured: Best of Year | Editors’ Picks | People’s Favorites | Satire | Guides | Observations | Stories
The Airport: For domestic flights, you should wake up at 4 a.m. and drive directly to the airport, no matter what time of day the flight is.
Any theatre professional who doesn’t win a Tony is dropped by their agent and forced to go renew their real estate license.
The whole town had gathered in the stands, because they were too poor to afford a place in the seats.
I think about how life could have been easier if I’d just stayed the course and resisted certain… urges.
Art is supposed to challenge us, to make us think, to make us laugh, to make us uncomfortable, and to make us say, “I remember that line from the video I just watched.”
Moving along. Shoot, these pages are out of order, gimme one sec... Here it is... Prompts for the "AWARE, BUT UNENTHUSED."
Yeah, low-stakes mingling is fun, but getting to explain the rules of rummy to a captive audience makes me feel alive.
Milk is fucking expensive. Let the cows bring me both my free dairy and the ability to skip the long Sunday checkout lines at the local Target.
Shaniqua is a life coach. When she asks, “What’s your destination?” she doesn’t mean on this trip; she’s talking about your life’s journey.
Her name is Miss S and she would be sucha goood servr cuz she is soo good at teeching me about all kind of stuff.
Don’t end up on a hilarious, reality prank show like "Milk or Sumo!"
This is also a good time to unwrap any candies or cough drops for which you anticipate a need and to pre-chew noisy crackers.