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Were you raised by parents who “loved you unconditionally,” regardless of your achievements and “accolades”?
Do not schedule the drill during prime hangover hours.
How lucky are we to have a youngly Master of Business Administration as land-lord! Thou hast every right to levy rents from my labour.
I come to this park to walk my dog and to scold teenagers doing skateboard tricks on the walkway.
I’ve made a few enemies along the way, as evidenced by the group chat telling me not to bring my “musty ass around game night anymore.”
I really believed that a gang of scrappy, oddball teenage underdogs like us could pull this off against all odds.
‘Tis several weeks beyond Christmas when you realize You forgot it completely—doggone it, time flies!
I usually stay in the center of your tummy but unfortunately today I’m writing to you from the deepest depths of what could be considered your "gut."
I have come to the stark realization that I am no longer funny. I say that having once had one of the world’s great senses of humor.
By the time I’m through with your tokens, they will be funged beyond recognition. I disrupt the blockchain. I drink your milkshake. I funge your tokens.
How do I use this machine for exercise? Just sit back and push up on the sad branches/robot arms, letting the weight fall back down with a loud SLAM.
WHAT WE’RE LOOKIN’ FOR… YOU: - Enjoy tippin’ over hot dog carts for craps n’ giggles - Like puttin’ pennies on train tracks and watching ‘em smoosh