List: Beauty Products for the Makeover You So Desperately Need
Our "Purge Ultime" Face & Body Scrub will also eliminate the general feeling of shame that has accompanied your existence since puberty.
Tag: Stress
Diary of a Grocery Store Employee During Coronavirus
I scrolled through Twitter and saw a few Forrest Gump references. Why? And then the storm hit: A text from my mom, “Tom Hanks has coronavirus.”
I’m Every Stock Photo of a Bewildered Stock Broker, Please Help Me
Every time I wearily hang my head into my hands and grit my teeth in frustration, there’s the media, plastering my visage on every downcast article.
List: Company-Wide Emails That Have Interrupted My Actual Work
Friendly reminder that client bathroom is for clients only / Executive you’ve never met leaving company / Routine system maintenance this weekend
Grown World: An Amusement Park for Adults
No Driver's License Bumper Cars: Like bumper cars, but only the child drives. You have to sit and incessantly pumping the imaginary brakes.
I Would Donate but I Don’t Think My $20 Million Can Make a Difference in This Election
They say every million counts but I just feel like another face in the crowd among all these millionaire donors.
List: FAQ for Newly Hired CEOs Still Learning to Be Assholes
Should I comment on my employees' ethnicity? We recommend a "don't ask don't tell" policy. Everyone should be white in your eyes.
New Analytics for Baseball’s Post-Cheating-Scandal Era
xBB/PPInn(Astros-VPonly): Number of beanballs or brushbacks per game vs. Astros hitters thrown by pitchers who pitched against Houston in 2017-19.
My Personal Statement Applying to Your Grad Program Because I’m 24 and Not Sure What Else to Do
What I love about education is that it provides the unique opportunity to do my homework instead of having to consider any future plans.
How to Tell if Your Boyfriend Is Really Your Boyfriend, Or a Stray Cat That Followed You in from Outside
Does he sleep between 16-20 hours a day? Does he curl up in a cute little ball in a perfect patch of sunlight to catch some ZZZs?
List: Parent or Broke, Inexperienced, Mediocre, Slightly Unethical, Overworked Public Defense Attorney?
Clients call at all hours night and day. / Spend 92% of day negotiating. / Know a lot of stuff but none of it seems to help when clients are crying.
List: How My Mother Believed I Was Destined to Die as a Teenager
Becoming macaroni and cheese, a lifeless foodstuff, after too many consecutive meals of macaroni and cheese. / Aneurysm upon seeing a boob on HBO.