Satire | Page 111 | Points in Case

Tag: Satire

We would like to apologize to some of our team members for leaving them off our initial list: Kyle in shipping, our office temp Brayden, and Aquaman.

We know you're eager to get back to inconsistent monthly visits to your 87-year-old father and checking your watch and sighing the entire time.

I know that our omni-everything boss is obsessed with blood metaphors, but this seems a bit gratuitous.

It consists of wearing a bespoke suit, carrying a pocket watch, looking through binoculars, and having a staunch belief that America peaked in 1948.

It was never my intention to glamorize having lots of sex with beautiful women and I'm sorry if it came across that way.

I wouldn’t know what to do with multi-book deals and movie rights and reprint rights and the avalanche of capital from being on the bestseller list.

If someone had asked me before I found her who Amelia Earhart was, I would have asked “Who?” unsuspiciously.

Concocting a knuckle sandwich is a delicacy in itself, and should be taken with care.

I woke up early. It doesn’t mean I experience the world differently. Coffee sometimes courses through my veins like a horse on EPO.

I’ve got a six-pack and hands that are strong but somehow also soft. Does that seem like someone who needs the vaccine right now?

You know, obviously I figured I’d do it at some point, but it always seemed so far away. It was something for when I was older.

Stranger still, though, is to accept the behavior of John and Maria as that of two characters who do not ultimately have sex.