Great Skipping Rocks

Good Skipping Rocks

Decent Rocks But Still Too Round For Skipping More Than 2 Times

Great Throwing Rocks

Good Throwing Rocks

Inferior Throwing Rocks For Throwing Aside So They Won’t Mix In With The Better Rocks



Microbiology Of Even Lesser Significance


The Second “Ashes” In The Phrase “Ashes To Ashes”


The Second “Dust” In The Phrase “Dust To Dust”

Jiffy Lube Employees Who “Fill Up” Your Wiper Fluid With An Empty Bottle (I Measured) And Charge You $15 Extra Without Asking If You Even Wanted It

Jiffy Lube Employees’ Significant Others Who Are Able To Maintain Serious Relationships With Them Despite Countless Misgivings Anyone Could Ascertain After Spending Five Minutes With Them (The Advertised Length Of Their Oil Changes By The Way)

Jiffy Lube Employees’ Pets Who Are Able To Show Them Affection When They Come Home From A Hard Day Of Scamming People By Secretly Adding Surcharges To Their Bill Without Asking

Rocks That Are Thrown At The Heads of Jiffy Lube Employees

Microbiological Diseases That Are Infecting The Open Wounds Created By The Rocks And Then Killing Said Jiffy Lube Employees

My Cigarette Ash

Dust In My Cabinet

The Ashes Of The Jiffy Lube Employee Who Had To Be Cremated Because The Rock Wound And The Disease Had Misfigured Them Beyond Recognition
So Much So That The Mortician Demanded It

The Dust That Settles Around The Base Of The Jiffy Lube Employee’s Urn (That The Family Was Way Overcharged For) Because Noone Has Visited It And It’s On The Mantle In A Burned Down House And All That’s Left Is The Chimney Because Chimneys Always Survive House Fires And Also Noone Bothered