You walk by a college campus, blackout, and regain consciousness while walking a two-foot-high tight rope. The only word that surfaces in your brain is “chill.”

Out of nowhere, you have this feeling deep in your bones that you could dominate some disc golf.


You’ve started whispering to yourself, “My vulnerability is my strength,” and you have no idea why.

About twice a week you wake up and you’re writing a hand-written letter to an old friend. You get the creeping sense that a deep and fulfilling relationship with them will be worth the emotional labor.

Emotional labor has revealed itself to you as a concept.


No matter how many times you wash your bathroom mirror, the message “McCain-Feingold didn’t go far enough” appears when you fog it up.


One morning you discover that your car was replaced with a Nissan Leaf. You are struck only by how “far out” your new ride seems.

You instinctively know to fill your Leaf with the compost juices pooled at the bottom of your new compost bin. Your Leaf’s mileage is magically tied to the amount of compost juice you produce each week.


You discover a brand new juicer on your counter one day and no one in your family put it there. For the first few days afterward, you spend countless hours wondering what new items are “juiceable.” Pretty soon you realize that anything—ANYTHING—you put in the juicer is juiceable.

No one bats an eye when you find yourself giving impromptu talks on “juiceability.”

Your body rejects any meals that don’t involve juice and/or flax.


The amount of mental energy you spend on juice-related topics more than quintuples and you are somehow cool with that.


Merrells are suddenly the only shoes that don’t “hurt your feet.” You find yourself explaining this fact about Merrells to strangers even though your feet have never hurt.

You get hiking now.


You have these occasional fits where you take to the ground and cat-cow. When people ask you what you’re doing, the only words that come out are, “My spine is grateful.”

You are suddenly and profoundly aware of your pelvic floor.

You understand that all your earthly powers originate in your pelvic floor.


You now live in Montreal and teach yoga.

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