If you did not bring the appropriate attire for slithering or clinging, please see me after the welcome circle for gloves and knee pads.
Tonight, if you have dedicated your life to anything other than archaic information, you’re gonna have a rough time.
Let’s see. What else can we dredge up from the darkest recesses of your mind to totally fuck up your night?
We've also installed security protocols to prevent you from divulging sensitive personal issues at work parties.
The journey has been fun, and there were certainly some parts I liked. Reading was cool.
The sooner you can recognize when you're talking down to yourself, the sooner you can stop already, Jesus.
Rise and grind, baby! And by that, I mean use an angle grinder to try and remove my court-mandated tracking bracelet.
Changing what you look like on the outside won’t change how you feel on the inside, but it’s still a ton of fun to adjust your avatar’s clothes.
Lethargy, or complanata torporem, meaning “flattened by torpor.” Use this defense when you’re desperately late out the door because it’s a cold.
Were you raised by parents who “loved you unconditionally,” regardless of your achievements and “accolades”?
Sure you have been up since 3 AM, counting the hours before you cry in the bathroom on your lunch break. That doesn’t mean you can’t tell others how to live.
SORRY I HAVE TO YELL OVER THE MUSIC IN THIS NIGHTCLUB BUT YOU LOOK LIKE YOU’RE SUCCUMBING TO ENNUI BRO
LISTEN BRO. JUST REMEMBER THAT YOU CAN ALWAYS COME TO ME WHEN YOU’RE FEELING THIS WAY BRO.