Stay Inside OR ELSE
An indie life simulation game where you are given a tiny family, who you must keep inside at all costs. However, they are intent on wandering outside, hanging out with their friends, and going to Walgreens because they’re bored/want to buy one yogurt cup. If they go outside, they explode into flames. (Think The Sims meets Chernobyl.) After a while, I got a little bored, and let everyone go. Still, I earnestly give it 4 out of 5 stars because they got every detail of Walgreens spot on. For similar games check out sites like The Old School Game Vault.
ICE, PAPERS, BEARS
Imagine this: you’re going to your job, but you can be stopped anytime and arrested by giant bears in a tiny clown car. If you don’t produce the right number of papers, you’ll be catapulted out of town. How do you get the papers? After playing the game for 72 hours straight, I still have no idea. Sure, it’s not the meatiest game you’ll play all year, but what it lacks in levels, it makes up for in sheer chaotic evil energy. I give it 3 out of 5 stars because I kept getting catapulted no matter what I did?
Messes Are for Both You and Me
A hit Japanese co-op game where you and your partner have to work together to perform a series of chores in an apartment that shrinks. If either of you gets angry, the walls collapse, ending the game. As you advance, you’ll be given children in the elite S levels. The key is that only one of the characters can watch TV, as the other homeschools the children, cleans, and cooks. For some reason the male character always prefers the TV.
End of the World 2
This game challenges you to end the world with increasing levels of plagues. You start with an earthquake, and end up leveling up (hurricane, swarm and locusts, etc) to ultimately bring about the rapture. Hint, you have to unlock “Evangelicals” in a side quest on level 5 by burning the Amazon.
War! What Is It Good For!
A video game inspired by the hit Edwin Starr song, where you’re a missile and your job is to take out targets without any warning. It’s part platformer, part puzzle—with an emphasis on speed. Honestly, the more you think about the strategy, the harder the level gets. Not available on anything except PS1.
Orange You Glad You’re Here?
You’re a giant orange barreling through town, trying to wreck as much as possible. With an open world format, you end up just rolling around the land without a clear objective. And yet, I can’t turn away. I have to give a – out of 5 stars because I still don’t understand the point of the game despite 40+ months of playing.