1. Jeepers creepers! They’re going to scratch the place up!
  2. Do me a solid and just follow the shiny ball.
  3. That guy must be on something—he can't stop licking himself!
  4. More tail than I expected.
  5. How many times are you felines gonna beg me for some sugar?
  6. No matter what far-out moves they do, they always land on their feet.
  7. Take a chill pill, spaz!
  8. These dudes are slippin’ and slidin’ on that wooden floor!
  9. I don't think President Jimmy Carter will be re-elected if this oil shortage lasts much longer. Do you copy?
  10. Gimme some skin—but not with the claws, honey!
  11. But baby, I don't wanna mind my own potatoes. I wanna cuddle!
  12. That is one fat cat!
  13. My man, I swear: peeing in the litter is bomb to the max.
  14. Uh oh, daddy-o, those lil mamas are having themselves a cat fight!
  15. Don’t be a bunny, space cadet! This is not copacetic!
  16. Here’s a couple balls you can boogie with… psych!
  17. Hey foxy mama, after I cut this rug, you and I should check out my shaggin’ wagon… Catch my drift?

1–8, 10–12, 14–16: Both
9: My groovy dad
13: New cat owner
17: My groovy dad, the night I was conceived