1. You are at home. Your partner left the mail out, and he is a pastry chef. There’s an unopened envelope from your credit card company. The envelope is very thick. Is this a cake?
2. You are at home. Lately your son has been watching cake decorating videos online and posting prank videos on TikTok. He had cereal this morning and left out a gallon of milk. Is this a cake?
3. You are at a fundraiser benefitting a well-known pastry school. There’s a flowerpot, filled with succulent flowers, up for silent auction. Is this a cake?
4. You are investigating a crime scene at the home of a famous baker. There is something that looks like a human body, covered in something wet and red. Is this a cake?
5. You are at a wedding. At the end of the reception, guests are encouraged to pick up a bag of party favors. Each bag contains something that looks like a cupcake inside. Is this a cake?
6. You are wandering in the desert. You were trying to find a secret supper club and you got lost. In the distance, you see what appears to be a glass of water on a pedestal. Is this a cake?
7. You are in prison. It’s the day where the librarian brings in a cart of books, but today the cart is brought in by a guard. Is this a cake?
8. You are seeing a production of “The Seagull” staged by an experimental theatre troupe. The actor who plays Konstantin handles the rifle in an uncharacteristically delicate manner. Is this a cake?
9. You are in purgatory. Terrifying chimerical beasts stand guard, stern and motionless. One of these beasts is staring at you intently with bright red eyes that are the same size, shape, and color as Red Hots. Is this a cake?
10. It’s your birthday. Your mother presents you with a glass parfait dish, filled to the brim. She says it’s a new recipe. All you can see is the substance on the top and sides that kind of looks like frosting or whipped cream. Is this a cake?
1-3: These are all cakes.
4: This is a cake, but there is also a dead body in the basement.
5: This is a piece of soap made to look like a cupcake. That had not stopped people from taking hard, difficult bites.
6-7: These are all cakes.
8: This is Chekhov’s cake, which is eaten in Act IV.
9: Humanity has been abandoned by the Lord for creating so many things that look like cakes that are not cakes. As a result, all human souls are immediately banished to Hell in the afterlife. As there is no longer a need for a purgatory, the beast does not exist and therefore it is not a cake.
10: This is a savory parfait filled with cheese, puff pastry, and hot dog pieces. What you thought was frosting or whipped cream is actually mashed potato. This is not a cake.