We applaud you for giving us something to do with our hands other than ball them up or masturbate.
All politicians want to have sex with Paul Rudd.
They Didn’t Have the Potato Chips We Usually Get, So I Made Sure to Grab the Most Disgusting Ones I Could Find
Neither of us like wasabi, but these are wasabi with cinnamon and pineapple, so I have a feeling the other two flavors will overpower the wasabi.
The goal is to attract deranged perverts and I just thought that maybe I could attract a higher class of horny weirdos, someone I could vibe with.
He could tell at once that this luncheon’s company would be quite dull, which was always exciting.
Theoretical Physicist Michio Kaku Asked Me to Stop Sending Him These Solutions to the Grandfather Paradox
Anyone who tries to create a paradox gets stopped by theoretical physicist Michio Kaku and his incredible superpowers.
My clone is always ill. Plus, our clones are deficient in blood, because we didn’t give them enough blood, so they are often woozy.
I can see that you've just put sunglasses on him. No, you're not allowed to "Weekend at Bernie's" an ice sculpture.
Oh McNo. I’m not McFeeling so McWell. My McVision is all McBlurred and I have a McPain in my McAbdomen.
September 21st, 10:02 PM: “The Big Stinker” spotted again three miles away, hovering outside an elderly woman’s second-story window.
Seven puts an end to the question, “Can a number outstay its welcome?” with a resounding, eye-rolling yes.
The final, most difficult step of my plan: don't act like a total creepy freak in front of other people all the time ever again.