Satire

Tag: Satire

Frankly, I’m just excited to have you back in my chair. After all, you ARE my favorite patient! Also, in many ways, you’re like a son to me.

I still don’t even really know what an em dash is. Or care to know for that matter.

I'll have been train hopping for two months at that point, so I might look a bit like the chimney sweep in Mary Poppins when I get in.

Emily, I couldn’t help but notice you texted “we’re gonna soooooooooo fucked up. 🤪” Would you be willing to own next steps on that?

We ask that all freed prisoners make their way back to the entrance of the Cave in an efficient, but respectful manner.

I mean just like, with the armed robbery in general, how do you think it’s going? Is this comparable to other bank robberies you’ve been through?

But, if I could offer one tiny suggestion, while you sound amazing, the song choice doesn’t show off your full potential.

Let me stop you. That’s not mold. That’s ambiance. That’s character. That’s the sort of authentic, rustic charm people pay top dollar for.

Ya'll must be nuttier than a squirrel's mouth to think you can set up establishments WITHOUT proper certification and licenses.

First, remember what you named the file. “Invention idea: the wheel”? “Wheel stuff”? “Wheel deets”? Maybe just “wheel”?

Can’t you see how clean my oven is? How filed my taxes are? How very walked my dog is? And yet, the thing is still not done.

By birth order or circumstantial trauma, you have been designated as the emotional backbone of the household.