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There's nothing understated about the way Americans celebrate July 4th. Get out of our way, we've got kegs and we're not afraid to drink them.
It is NOT OK if you do any of the following: stand in doorways, sit on the same side of the table as your girlfriend at a restaurant, travel in large packs to parties.
With entrees like those sweet, tender Honey BBQ Baby Backs and an endless supply of mouthwatering sides, there's no need for human relationships.
Thorough preparation is often the key to success. Of course, one's definition of "prepared" may vary greatly.
2007 was a shitshow, a debacle, and we loved every goddamn second of it, from tasers and iPhones to Britney Spears and Anna Nicole Smith.
You can tell a lot about a person from the defects in their handshaking, whether it's too weak, too strong, or the grab is poorly timed.
For those who need to masturbate so often that there's no choice but to do it in front of their roommate, try The Party Boy or The Diversion Trick.
Vegetable deaths outweigh animal deaths by the BILLIONS. And no vegetable is safe, not even the baby carrot.
A healthy dose of Adderall and a "fuck it" attitude can get you through final exams stress free. Or just cheat, whatevs.
Your friends have finally forced you off your Xbox and out of the house to meet a real girl. Will you make it through the evening with her?
Sex now is scarier than your first time, thanks to a myriad of new diseases and dicks runnin' wild.
Women will never understand the strange view men have of monogamy. The view set forth decades ago by pioneers like Johnny Appleseed.