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After a long, hearty march to end the war, Sherman and his men were disappointed, although understanding, of the equally long, less hearty march back from the sea.
Prince Percy: "General Haggis, lovely rousing words, but I was wondering if I might also have a word with our men before the glorious fight..."
Of course we'll have flying cars in the future. But there's more to driving than cars; there's going to be a whole new driving etiquette based on personal responsibility.
My intention for writing this was never to shame Officer McClane. In fact, I've learned to forgive the "cowboy cop" altogether. But there is a lesson to be learned from this.
What if tomorrow you woke up and were a bear? Would you go in the woods? If you did, what if nobody was happy about it? What if you didn’t care?
“You should always let your meat rest after it’s been cooked," they say. Does the chicken really need to rest after two hours of inactivity? Isn’t being dead rest enough?
Learn from the mistakes of the tormented souls you will see on this tour of Internet Hell, or risk paying your next visit not as a guest, but with an account.
It’s difficult to argue a case for celebrities: why we need them, what good they do, and why we shouldn’t rummage through their bins and sniff their dirty underwear.
The bartender on Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday nights is my best friend. So it would be irresponsible to waste an opportunity for 33% off drinks, RIGHT?!
Listen Admiral Ackbar, we all agree you're doing a super job as admiral, but we'd appreciate it if you could stop yelling "It's a trap!" for the rest of the hunting trip.
I twist nicknames into erotica. I randomly default to German. I'm a quirky invisible playmate. I graduated college with a major AND a minor. I rule your iPhone.
Birthdays used to be milestones I looked forward to; now they’re just reminders of everything I haven’t accomplished, even though I’m 1/3 of the way dead.