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We used to have lights, but we found that they reminded people way too much of their cell phone screens, so we got rid of them.
Tag: Tech
Is Your Nest Malfunctioning or is Your Brentwood Mansion Haunted?
Do your thoroughbred Tibetan Mastiffs refuse to walk past your Nest Detect Sensor™ into the the conservatory where your stepfather passed away?
Never Be Forced to Talk to Your Family Again with Nextdoor’s New App, DownTheHall
Jimmy Silverman (Jimmy’s Room): Was anybody in my room the other night? I heard strange noises coming from my closet and it smelled like bad eggs.
The Complete Guide to Looking Old Without FaceApp
Ask your millennial co-worker if they need a muscle relaxer when they talk about Twitch, then find out it's not what your back does after a workout.
Dear Employees: Please Fill Out Fortune’s “Best Companies to Work For in 2019” Survey, or You Will Be Tossed Into the Fiery Lava Pit
The new Boiling Lava Pit contains molten volcanic lava from the island of Heimaey, because here at DigiTech --- Authenticity Matters ©.
9 Apps That Could Be Dating Apps If You’re Desperate Enough
Uber: For Speed Dating - Sit up front because "you get carsick." Ask the driver if they have any siblings. If they ask you back, you’re in.
Introducing the Apple Car
That hood and the entire car frame is made out of Gorilla Glass, the material you smudge every day and crack every other week on your iPhone screen.
If Google is Serious About Regaining Our Trust, It Must Start by Offering Alternative Ways to Torture the Small Yellow Man in Google Maps
The Google Maps user demands options, from dangling the man above a pack of wild dogs, to launching him across the Bering Strait in a slingshot.
Bernie Man: The Festival for Everyone Who Still Says Bernie Would Have Won
Some of our most popular attractions from past festivals include Soylent breweries, meme-hacking spaces, and, by state law, a Ben & Jerry's.
HGTV Announces “The Joyce Byers Complete Home Makeover Show”
Witness participants’ dreams of a new home go unfulfilled as they contend with Joyce’s dismantling of their house to find her missing son, Will.
10 Hashtags Better Than #amwriting
#amactuallywritinggoodshit – This is a great hashtag to show other writers you’re not just writing, you’re writing better stuff than they are!
Junior Level Wonka.com Hacker Secrets Revealed
I wasn’t ever good enough to win a high score, but I found my satisfaction in changing these poor kids’ passwords so they could never log in and play.