Our New Corporate Cybersecurity Rollout Protects Your Computer by Rendering It Completely Inaccessible to You
Once your laptop reboots, please use the following case-sensitive password to log in: MyNameIsToddAndImAFuckingIdiot
Once your laptop reboots, please use the following case-sensitive password to log in: MyNameIsToddAndImAFuckingIdiot
Hapless criminals looking for qualified candidate to provide wakeup service to a suburban Chicago family with an early morning flight.
I hear people claim the internet is watching their every move, and I say "Are my moves not worthy?"
Rose* (Human Resources Officer, 1999-Present): He walked into this office on his very first day with that Hot Pocket.
I always knew I was meant for something greater, something I can truly touch people with, and get as much cash and booty in the process as possible.
As I’ve come down with a bad case of wet-ass this summer (medical condition), Marcus could easily catch me and force me to share the bicycle.
Provide your real name. Slappy, Mr. Chuckles, Giggle Master, Miss Jiggles-a-Lot, and Happy Pappy are not legal names we recognize.
Wait a minute, if this busker is singing “Private Eyes” again, that means that he’s starting his repertoire again from the top.
You'll be on hold for at least 45 minutes before you hang up in an impotent rage, so may I help you with anything else before I transfer you over?
What’s the point of locating a family to scare and waiting under a bed, if when I crawl out to scare the kid, they’re not even in there?
The Google Maps user demands options, from dangling the man above a pack of wild dogs, to launching him across the Bering Strait in a slingshot.
I wasn’t ever good enough to win a high score, but I found my satisfaction in changing these poor kids’ passwords so they could never log in and play.