I’m 10 Now, Which Means I’m the Biggest Little Bitch on This Playground
Looking around, all I see are duds. In the sandbox, I see toddlers who don’t even know how to use their own feet.
Tag: Satire
How to Wash Your Wool Blanket in 10 Simple Steps
The wool fibers prefer an east-to-west cross-breeze coming from a north- and south-facing window.
Ten Little Monkeys, the Psychological Thriller
Mama called the Doctor and the Doctor said, “If this is some sort of prank call, it’s not funny. I’m a busy doctor helping patients with real problems.”
I’m the Tall Guy Blocking Your View at a Concert, Here’s What I Want You to Know
I’ve been told that the back of my head is so soft, it's like those $10 holiday blankets you get at Target.
The Real Seagulls of New Jersey, Season 9
Laugh and caw with your favorite Real Seagulls as they whisk newcomer Jenny to Miami for a caliente seawater bender.
OnlyAficionados: The Platform for Stately British Gentlemansluts
Good’morrow to you all. A most gracious welcome to my webbing page. I am Keithly. Behold my rump.
Addressing Your Concerns About Me, Your Town’s New Superhero
No, this is not my superhero outfit. Just once you get used to Spandex it’s hard to go back to restrictive dockers.
Squirrel Police Blotter
Squirrel Police Department dispatch received a call from a squirrel who said he wasn't sure, but it seemed like he was being shadowed by a red-tailed hawk.
How to Manage a Household Infestation of Artists from the Romantic Period
Don’t leave any emotions or aesthetic experiences on exposed surfaces overnight.
If the IRS Wrote Thank You Notes
We wanted to let you know how deeply we were moved by your generous mandatory contribution. 30% of your base income… It was just what we wanted!
The 12 Steps of Recovering a Forgotten Password
Somewhere, up in the cloud someplace, there is a benevolent being that can let you back into your SubzScription account.
Can You Call Back Later, Ma? I’m Whackin’ a Guy Here
Ma, you hear that? The boys say hi. They're blowing kisses too. Joe "Ice Pick" Angelini says thank you for the chicken cacciatore.