Addressing Your Concerns About Me, Your Town’s New Superhero
No, this is not my superhero outfit. Just once you get used to Spandex it’s hard to go back to restrictive dockers.
No, this is not my superhero outfit. Just once you get used to Spandex it’s hard to go back to restrictive dockers.
We wanted to let you know how deeply we were moved by your generous mandatory contribution. 30% of your base income… It was just what we wanted!
Eaten an Oreo without twisting it open and gnawing out the cream; just bit right into that motherfucker.
All mouth-blown, no helium balloon pumps allowed! And when I say “we,” I really mean just me.
We are here to serve scorn and derision, and able to discern the net worth of patrons with a half-second, contemptful glance.
12:30 PM, reads the Faberge Egg clock the CFO gifted me for having such a good PSAT score.
I nodded off for like two seconds and woke up to fresh ink stains on my fingers, and a notary public closing his briefcase and heading out the door.
28.5%: Waitstaff pleased the King by referring to him only as "my lord" or "my goodly liege."
You never know what kind of connections you’ll make. One of these people could be your ex-boyfriend or your current physical therapist.
On Wednesday he ate through his employee's 401ks, but he was still hungry.
Streaking on the quad? We've got something way sicker for you: freelance income earned across multiple tax jurisdictions.
Tie-Dye Sonics Blindfold: Take a moment to soak in the game-day atmosphere by succumbing to all of your other senses.