Addressing Your Concerns About Me, Your Town’s New Superhero
No, this is not my superhero outfit. Just once you get used to Spandex it’s hard to go back to restrictive dockers.
Tag: Money
If the IRS Wrote Thank You Notes
We wanted to let you know how deeply we were moved by your generous mandatory contribution. 30% of your base income… It was just what we wanted!
Have You Even Lived?
Eaten an Oreo without twisting it open and gnawing out the cream; just bit right into that motherfucker.
When You Shop My Balloon Bouquet Small Business Where I Blow Every Single Balloon by Mouth, You’re Supporting Real People
All mouth-blown, no helium balloon pumps allowed! And when I say “we,” I really mean just me.
I’m an Hermés Sales Associate, and You Need to Get the Fuck Out
We are here to serve scorn and derision, and able to discern the net worth of patrons with a half-second, contemptful glance.
My Day as an Intern, as Imagined by My Exceedingly Optimistic Parents
12:30 PM, reads the Faberge Egg clock the CFO gifted me for having such a good PSAT score.
Mom, Can You Come Pick Me Up? The Guys Registered Another Offshore Financial Subsidiary in My Name
I nodded off for like two seconds and woke up to fresh ink stains on my fingers, and a notary public closing his briefcase and heading out the door.
A Guide to Tipping (If Your Young Child Has Chosen to Declare Himself the Table King)
28.5%: Waitstaff pleased the King by referring to him only as "my lord" or "my goodly liege."
Upgrade to LookedAt Premium to See Who’s Been Viewing the Back of Your Head This Week
You never know what kind of connections you’ll make. One of these people could be your ex-boyfriend or your current physical therapist.
The Very Hungry Caterpillar Executive
On Wednesday he ate through his employee's 401ks, but he was still hungry.
In Lieu of Hazing, Our Fraternity Will Make You Do Our Taxes
Streaking on the quad? We've got something way sicker for you: freelance income earned across multiple tax jurisdictions.
We’ve Made a Few Cutbacks to This Season’s Promotional Schedule
Tie-Dye Sonics Blindfold: Take a moment to soak in the game-day atmosphere by succumbing to all of your other senses.