Deer Court,

I have seen 1 or 2 yearling whitetailed deer with a female many times while hunting. I have never shot the female (the mother). At what point do the yearlings not need the mother for milk and/or survival?

I have always wondered about this. Thanks!

Dan the Milkman
Erwin, MI
Dear Dan the Milkman,

You're overthinking this one. As soon as you pull the trigger, the yearlings no longer need the mother for milk or survival. Just make sure not to hit the mother.

Court (the deer)

Deer Court,

What do you think is a fair fee for a quality Whitetail mount? Some pics would be nice. My mount here cost $275.

Dear Greg,

How can you even THINK of putting a price on a deer life?!

Just kidding, that's some weird human thinking I heard last week at the office after one of my co-workers offered to kill our boss and sell his soul to the devil for a reasonable fee.

Many people place a lot of emphasis on the work that the taxidermist does, but you should be more concerned with how good your deer's hygiene was before you killedit, as well as it's lifestyle. It's kind of like buying a used car and evaluating the habits of the seller more than the car itself.

Your mount shows signs of a deer without a proper grooming regimen. Baggy, saggy eyes indicate overuse of eye drops; brown stained antlers indicate he was not brushing and flossing every day (or perhaps he regularly poured coffee on his head to wake up in the morning); black, glossy lips indicate he was a goth deer; and that white patch under the chin shows he was a horribly uncoordinated shaver. Plus, he looks like an asshole. I would expect to pay at least $800 for your mount, in order to fix all of your deer's flaws.

I don't have any whitetail mount pics because honestly, I'm not a murderer. However, I do have a pic of my latest dragon mount! Talk about a tough kill!

Court (the deer)