FAQs for the Company Reply-All Email Thread
Q: I don't seem to be getting any other emails besides the reply-all thread. Can you fix that? A: Great question! Again, sorry, but no.
Tag: FAQs
Pickleball: A Guide for Those Who Are Confused
Slang names for pickleball include lazy tennis, geriatric badminton, and "a weak excuse to drink Gatorade."
FAQ About Your Genetically Engineered Baby
Is it normal for my baby to be eight feet tall and have laser eyes? It depends on whether or not you bought the deluxe model.
Why Our New Ad Campaign Only Targets Reptilian-Human Hybrids
The government began funding the reptilian-human-hybrid breeding program in the late 1940s. The perfect age to discover the wonders of retirement living.
Introducing the Sam Super Loyalty Card
So wait, I can’t meet with you/speak to you/copulate with you without a loyalty card? Unfortunately not!
Frequently Asked Questions About Our Fragile Democracy
What does democracy look like? This is what democracy looks like: it’s kind of pear-shaped.
FAQ: What Concerned Kids Need to Know to Keep Their Adults Safe on Facebook
Q. What is Facebook? A. It’s a great place for people to connect with others who are also lonely in the suburbs.
FAQ About the Hell Button I Had Installed in the Elevator
Q. Should I worry about the fact that people keep disappearing after using the elevator? A. I wouldn't.
FAQ: Your Aunt’s Second Facebook Profile
I always misplace the Post-it where you jotted down my password, leading me to wildly click around until something happens.
FAQ for Our Totally Empowering, Body Positive, Size-Inclusive Swimwear Line
Q: Your website says that you’re size inclusive, but you only go up to size L. Are you out of stock of larger sizes?
Things White Men Are Tired of Hearing
Look: I’m white. I’m a man. My home and backyard are filled with dangerous worker bees that produce honey for me. It’s not that unusual.
When Am I Ever Going to Use This in the Real World, 2021 Edition
The grocery store is like a math classroom come to life. This fact is true even as the global food supply chain crumbles.