Hasbro (™) , formally known as Hassenfeld Brothers, is raising awareness that despite the various word games available on your smartphone, that material analog Scrabble ® still exists. The tangible, physical board game is available at all major retailers. For years and years since the dawn of smart devices, you have stared into digital oblivion trying to ignore the rest of the world, specifically, your 92-year-old immigrant grandma when she insists on spending time with you. Scrabble® has always been here and will always be here to help you spend time with said aforementioned grandma without the pressure of conversation.
When you need a break from the mind-numbing fixation of staring at your phone, Scrabble® is here to help you experience the corporeal sensation of creating words. Instead of randomly playing combinations of letters to see if an algorithm will accept them, you can just google words with the phrase “valid scrabble.”
Additionally, unlike those pesky digital games that force you to interact with internet strangers, Scrabble® allows you to yell at your grandma that the blank in “EN_OY” is a V, which she will misinterpret as T because she’s hard of hearing but once you yell V again then she’ll think it’s C, until you desperately look for and place a V tile over the blank, so she finally understands. You can’t accomplish such intimacy in the digital scape.
If you’re worried about tile movement on your board, we recommend the deluxe version with recessed game spaces to keep your tiles stationary. This advantage to this version is that it immobilizes tiles just like in digital word games, minimizing potential board disruption from your grandma’s walker and precluding any confusion as to whether or not you played “SHOES” as opposed to “SHOTS.” Your senses will be heightened by the feel of the wooden tiles between your fingers as you take them from the luxurious velvet bag, instead of merely tapping on a glass screen with your index finger. Besides Scrabble® provides those invaluable moments where you yell at your grandma that “JARL” is indeed a word, without further explanation because you’re just trying to get rid of that damn J and you don’t have the patience or lung capacity to explain it’s a Norse chieftain that is a valid Scrabble word.
If you purchase directly from our website within the next 24 hours, we pledge that the letter Q will be excluded from your tileset. None of those other digital games provide a letter set without the Q, now do they? No longer will you have to give up your precious blank or a U to help your grandma get rid of it. With this version of our beloved game, you can more efficiently help yourself help your grandma take her turn, every turn in every game every day twice a day. You will never again exclaim, “DADIJI! TORQUE, AS IN TWISTING IN PHYSICS. IT’S NOT SPECIAL ENGLISH, JUST REGULAR ENGLISH.” We hope spending quality time with your grandma will get you to purchase the palpable Scrabble and delete those intellectually numbing, sensually bankrupt word games from your phone!
About Hasbro Games
Hasbro Games has been producing board games that you can use to sublimate your feelings towards your relatives since 1937. These games include Monopoly, Clue, and Yahtzee.