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The toughest, most complicated holiday of the year exemplifies the emotional dichotomy between men and women. Solutions anyone?
It's not like you're wearing sunglasses you know. I can feel the heat from your eyes burning on me like a thousand suns. You want me so badly.
Forget everything you know about gambling and put on your winner's hat. If you bet on red long enough, there's no way you'll end up in the black.
Not to burst your bubble or anything, but when a test is graded by a robot, you're going to need some advanced study techniques.
The recently de-classified, scintillating correspondence between two desperate and impassioned prisoners. Yes, you can cook with Vaseline.
Once a hookup, ALWAYS a hookup. You won't need a scientist to tell you that this theory will help lubricate your next dry spell.
Ladies, you've been pre-approved for everything you desire. Just learn to milk your man for every last drop that he's worth and it's truly priceless.
When you wake up feeling like there's a wolverine in your stomach, it turns out an enema is your only friend. Beware the oil spill.
Please don't ignore the wisdom of experienced college cleaning staff. Because when it comes to brothels, they know exactly which type of ecstasy to avoid.
You find a bottle of Bacardi outside your dorm. Do you: Bring it inside and share the wealth? Or, guzzle it all down and meet your END?
Unfortunately, Hannah Montana (aka Miley Cyrus) is destined for celebrity slutdom just like Lindsey Lohan and Britney Spears.
Human relationships getting stale? Save time, breath, and money by investing in the emotional and sexual stability of a lifelike robot model.