Subject: Pizza for breakfast?!
To: [email protected]
September 10, 9:08 AM
Mr. Claymore,
Biiiiiig Domino's fan here. That’s why I’m so excited to bring you this whopper of an idea. You’re gonna love it. Drum roll, please…
BREAKFAST PIZZA!
There it is! Think about it. You see breakfast burritos. Breakfast sandwiches. Even breakfast burgers. But no breakfast pizza? It’s an untapped market, just waiting for a couple of pizza pioneers like us.
Imagine: scrambled eggs, with bacon and cheese, or sausage and peppers, all on one crust… Yes, please! What about an eggs benedict pie—with ham and hollandaise? Maybe even a chilaquiles pizza!
This is a home run, right?
I can’t wait to talk to you about this. We could change the breakfast world together, you and me. And the pizza world.
I have a TON of ideas. You just wait. Here’s a teaser: CREAM CHEESE SAUCE. (Are you picturing a lox bagel pie? Because I sure am!)
Sincerely,
Steve M. Robertson
P.S. I don’t want any money or anything for this idea. Just the knowledge that we’ve made mornings a little bit tastier. 🙂
Subject: Following Up! (Check Spam?)
To: [email protected]
September 17, 2:22 PM
Mr. Claymore,
It’s been a week so I wanted to check in. I know you’re a busy guy, but this is an industry-rocking opportunity! Let’s get it going!
If you didn’t see my first email, maybe check your spam folder?
Steve
P.S. Speaking of spam… what about Spam on a breakfast Hawaiian? I’m telling you, I got ideas coming out my ears.
Subject: History WILL NOT be kind to the man who ignored breakfast pizza.
To: [email protected]
CC: [email protected]
September 22, 1:17 AM
Not gonna lie, Rob. Reallllly feel like you’re blowing it here. Not even a reply? I could take this to Papa Johns you know.
Let me put it this way: It’s 1995. Some guy comes to Pizza Hut and says these two words: “stuffed crust.” Imagine if they’d have passed that up. Talk about regrets! I’m just saying…
P.S. CC’ing to your personal, too. You can’t afford to miss this.
Subject: Sorry.
To: [email protected]
CC: [email protected]
September 22, 11:55 AM
Hey Robert, allow me to apologize. I was in a bad place last night. I didn’t mean what I said. I would never go to Papa Johns.
I’m just passionate. If that’s a crime, sue me.
Anywho, don’t you worry: I’m a loyal Domino's guy, through and through.
And I can be patient. When you’re ready to talk breakfast pizza, we’ll talk breakfast pizza.
P.S. What about a dessert option? Like a French toast pizza? Or a pancake pie?
Subject: re: how’d you get my personal email??
To: [email protected]
September 22, 8:20 PM
Rob! Glad to hear from you. FINALLY. Jk. All good!
So, to answer your questions:
1) Yes, I’m very aware of the Customer Support portal, but you think I could trust this gamechanger with some clueless intern? You think the guy who came up with the Blizzard just sent a postcard to DQ headquarters? Yeah, right!
2) I got your personal email from your friend, David Canton.
P.S. You didn’t say what you thought about the idea! Breakfast. Freakin’. Pizza. Can’t wait to chat!
Subject: re: re: how’d you get my personal email??
To: [email protected]
September 23, 12:10 PM
Sheesh! This is just a big ol’ misunderstanding. I didn’t look at any personal information on David’s computer. No bank statements, no passwords, no photos, no nothing. I just got your email address, and got out!
Plus… if you’d have answered my first few emails I wouldn’t have had to “hack” into his laptop… Work with me here!
Anyways, the suspense is killing me! Breakfast pizza? Awesome or what?
Subject: re: stop calling me
To: [email protected]
September 26, 9:31 AM
Rob! Glad to hear you got my voicemail. You should have just called me back!
Okay, so I know I’m being a bit persistent. (Not quite the word you used, was it? Adult language warning! LOL!) But … did you know that Colonel Sanders was rejected more than 1,000 times before people saw his genius?
I must say, I’m really quite surprised that you’re not jumping at this idea. However, I think this baby might just tip the scales: HASHBROWN CRUST. Come on! I seriously don’t know where I get this stuff.
Subject: re: do not come here again
To: [email protected]
October 2, 3:44 PM
So cool to see HQ! What a campus. Of course, I was really hoping for a little brainstorm sesh with you. Talk shop, toss around some more b-fast zza ideas, etc.
TBH I was pretty bummed when I was escorted out as soon as I got there. I know you’re busy, but 1,100 miles is a LONG WAY to travel just to get turned down at the door! It’s okay, though. When you believe in something you keep going, right?
P.S. What about an over-easy egg option? Just plop a few right on the pie and boom—runny yolk! On your pizza! That blow your mind as much as it did mine?
Subject: re: restraining order
To: [email protected]
October 5, 10:19 AM
Ha, yeah, I got that little restraining order. I’m not worried, though! I firmly believe that you’ll rip up that paper when you read this lil gem. Ready? Wait for it…
BREAKFAST CALZONES.
This is huge, Rob. Huge.
Robert Claymore
c/o Domino's Pizza, Inc.
30 Frank Lloyd Wright Dr.
Ann Arbor, MI
48106
Robert,
Did you know that jail doesn’t allow computer use? Hence this old-school handwritten letter. Well, I did not! Also, didn’t know it was that big of a deal to wait for someone in their living room. Anyway, I’ve been doing some thinking. Check this out. Lunch today was spaghetti. I was like, what? Pasta is a DINNER food! And then it hit me: what I (and the rest of the world!) have been missing…
BREAKFAST PASTA.
What a concept! Can’t wait to hear your thoughts.
Sincerely,
Steve M. Robertson