Funny Away Messages >> Finals and Midterms

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Help! My grades have fallen and they can’t get up.

You can’t test me, you can only hope to grade me.

Finals are like blow jobs – they’re hard, they suck and you never want to do it again.

If I were a statistics exam, I would calculate the odds of people failing the hell out of me, then I would say, "Nice curves."

If I were a business exam, I would write myself off.

If I were a chemistry exam, I would eliminate the element of surprise.

If I were an economics exam, I would explain to the professor the opportunity cost of spending extra time making the exam any harder when he would still get paid the same either way.

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