Presidents are coming along nicely. I watched as a tiny Grover Cleveland push, push, pushed his way out of a synthetic eggshell.
1. Every portrait makes me look like a Relief Pitcher for the 1974 Chicago White Sox.
I need your support to create an America where I, as President, never have to make direct eye-contact with any of you
Ulysses S. Grant: A cup of whole beans--Starbucks Christmas Blend--to eat raw as he squashes his enemies.
“Would you like some ice chips?” Chef Aut asks me. “Ice is for penguins,” I say. “And chips are for Brits.”
Item Removal Charge: 660 million expired, room temperature vaccine doses. Attached note: “SEND BACK. Already had virus!”
Joe takes me out onto the balcony, places his strong, soft hands on my cheeks and whispers softly in my ear, “Amtrak.” We make love under the moon.
Simon says please welcome the presidential candidates with any sort of noises you find appropriate—bearing in mind their last performance.
JOE: Talene, it’s Joe. TALENE: I know :)) TALENE: it’s so good to hear from you TALENE: I feel like we kind of fell off a few nights ago....
Joe won’t end gas stations sometimes having bathrooms but sometimes definitely not, with no discernable reason why.
While there's lots of bad information out there about voting, you clearly aren't someone to fall for silly distractions. Right?
For four years we've turned a blind eye to the despicable actions Trump has taken. It's time we focus the discussion squarely on him for once.