Are You Ordering a Drink at a Crowded Bar or Picking Up Your Meds from the Local Pharmacy?
Random people keep jostling you to get to the front of the amorphous blob you’ve been waiting in for 30 minutes.
Emily Knapp is a Colorado based writer and comedian. She is originally from Chicago, but fled west because she really likes seeing the sun in February. Her writing has been featured in Writers Resist, McSweeney's, Slackjaw, Points in Case, Weekly Humorist, and other places on the internet. Her apartment currently resides in Golden, but you can find her in the mountains writing, hiking, running, or skiing. If she's not doing any of that, she is 100% eating tacos.
Random people keep jostling you to get to the front of the amorphous blob you’ve been waiting in for 30 minutes.
Ulysses S. Grant: A cup of whole beans--Starbucks Christmas Blend--to eat raw as he squashes his enemies.
I can’t and I can’t even. Whatever phrase works best for you to understand that I can’t help you.
I woke up today thinking it was Thursday, but it turns out it might be Tuesday. I’m not really sure because both of them start with a “T.”
Listen to your yelp as you touch my hot leather seats. Feel the burn, baby. I can feel the panic rising in your breath.