This is on both of us: you put me in the position of being responsible for humanity, and I let my savior complex feed right into that.
Let me know if "Indulgence preachers hate him!" works for you as a tagline.
Summer 312 AD: Constantine Wins and Finds Jesus: Beating your nemesis and then becoming sanctimonious about it? 312 AD was a classic WBS.
His mother asketh him to get milk for he hath complained of thirst: but he drew in mischief a bottle of Sonoma Coast Chardonnay she loved dearly.
What to Do if Your Mother Keeps Hinting that You, The One True Begotten Son of God, Should Really Give Her Grandkids Already
Every Chanukah for the past seven years she kept telling you she doesn't want you to buy her anything, with “BUY” and “THING” in air quotes.
This movie is about me. But it’s also about love and family and loyalty and Christianity, but don’t say that last part out loud.
Does everyone have a string of rosary beads? It's very important to warm your muscles by lightly flagellating your body.
"When was the last time you worked?" Well, technically, as the Messiah, I am always working. But as a carpenter, I worked about three months ago.
While my MCAT scores were not the most competitive, I am a self-directed learner with strong communication skills and also I died for your sins.
"We are an open democracy and welcome 180-degree feedback circle." This is a weak start; we need a strong first point that will set the tone.
We Only Use Murphy’s Oil Soap to Clean These Church Pews So Get the Fuck Off My Nuts with Your All-Natural Homemade Cleaner
“Pine?” No. That’s not “pine,” bitch. That’s the smell of me frolicking through the forest with Jesus.
Held the top spot on The New York Times best seller list for 104,780 weeks before getting knocked off by Fifty Shades of Gray.