There's no way I'm going to pass the anchor-shaped keychain I got from my beach trip.
I’ve been locked in a trunk so many times I’m startin’ to think I’m a set of jumper cables!
And so I asked Conqueror if he was a new Uber driver, and he said unto me, "As a matter of fact, this is my first day driving."
Are You an Actor Starring in a Pickup Truck Commercial or a Suburbanite Driving a Truck in Real Life?
1. Did you shave today? A. No. I possess the miraculous ability to always maintain four-day stubble. B. Yes. It’s expected at the accounting firm.
Do you need one that’s beefy enough to pull a livestock trailer if you decide to offer goat yoga at the staycation glampground you're planning?
Clip a small dumbbell to each middle finger and do three sets of 50 reps while reaching up and out with your arms.
The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in 3,362 pounds of pure American muscle, must be intolerably stupid.
Dust Jiffy Lube Employees Who “Fill Up” Your Wiper Fluid With An Empty Bottle And Charge You $15 Extra Without Asking If You Even Wanted It
I do know that many of those who are driven to this used car lot are desperately searching for those pockets of silence where we can drive and grow.
I was so concerned to hear that, after entering your data, you were presented with a mangled 1988 Pontiac Fiero covered in blood, shit, and fire.
Btw can’t pay you, but will provide you with a new car air freshener. The beavers have a bit of an odor. Not bad, but definitely noticeable.
- You're warning me about the grizzly bear in my blind spot. - You're using Morse Code to ask me out on a date.