A Guide to the Various Women of My Dreams
Including "The Capable Ice Road Trucker" and "The Priest Who Challenged Me to a Rap Battle at My Nephew’s Baptism.”
Comedy Writing
The Recent Painting Vandalisms Are a Cheap Imitation of My Performance at My Daughter’s School Art Fair
I knew blanketing a third-grade class’s first art exhibition with cans of pasta would be controversial, but that’s why I did it
This Bowl Sure Is Getting Hot, Huh?
Now I’m halfway to the table, and this bowl is burning my fucking hands off.